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heyhae
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Name: Hae Ryung
Birthday: 2/18/1982
Gender: Female
Interests: imaginary cooking, chillin with friends, torturing friends, doing nothing, playing guitar and many more
Expertise: benign violence, coming up with random ideas, relating everything into science, making people laugh, relaxation (not me, but others), being a friend
Occupation: Student
Industry: Education/Research
Message: message me
Member Since:
3/18/2003
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| A LOT has been going on in my life, and I used to wonder why God placed me in such continuous storm that I am not able to handle. Now I realize it was all God's plan and His will, and that is that. I've learned to have such peace in times of turmoil, so that I can wait on God and follow the path He has laid out. I learned to trust Him, to depend on Him and submit to Him.
I think it was around the time of lent, maybe slightly before that, but God was in His healing process with me. I was a mess to begin with, was saved, healed and cleaned up, and became a mess again. and again... and again.... Beginning of this year, God took away a major burden in my life. He changed my perspective on things, and removed this emotional callous that has controlled my mind for my entire life. Major improvement from this is that I promised God, myself and to people that I'll never complain ever again. As I deeply meditated on this thing about thanksgiving and my complaining heart, God showed me that all the difficult things He has called me into, is the cross He wants me to carry. As difficult as it is, what used to be my complaint has now become my joy.
Last year during Easter and passion week, God has shown me His JOY while Jesus endured the cross. "...for He saw the JOY that was set before Him... endured the cross..." Passion of the Christ is really His joy. This year, He has shown me the thanksgiving of the cross He carried, and the cross I must carry.
I am truly thankful.
No book could have taught me this, no doctrine or teaching or theology would have pulled me through. Only by His grace, mercy and love am I able to stand today.
Thank you
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| I don't even know who reads my xanga anymore and if people care at all...
and I know I'm not the best at keeping in touch with people, but yet again,
I am at a moment that requires tons of prayer.
There's a battle that's been continuing ever since I came here to Austin, Tx,
and it's not a personal battle. It's complex and huge, and sometimes I think
that it's unsurmountable, but my faith tells me that nothing is impossible with God.
I had a conversation with someone that might change the lives of many many
people, but I see how delicate and careful one must be.
I believe God has planned this moment for a long time, and I see how He is
working in all of this. I also feel the fierce spiritual battle, and how the enemy
is trying it's final scheme to steal everything away. But the victory is already
ours. I just need a LOT of prayers so that everyone involved will live to lift
up His name. I know His glory will be revealed, His name lifted high, and
the church will once again be victorious.
I truly hope someday I'll be able to share my testimony and praise reports. As
difficult as it is here, (trust me, it's beyond what I can handle) I know God is
here and He is moving. I honestly desire to share more, but I believe
heavenly wisdom is blocking my lips right now. But please pray....
thank you~~
Praise Him!
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| Man... I remember posting up a prayer about getting this sweet dog.
Well, God answered i and we got her~
Her name is Ari, she's the cutest, sweetest thing in the world. She's scared
of pretty much everything, tests our patience all the time, loves to sleep and
run around, likes o cuddle, and man, she's fun to play with.
I know this is not a good picture, but she can't stay still for one moment, so
that's the best one I got.
It's hard being a mommy esp. if you have to be out most of the time. My roommate
is the better, nicer parent. I'm the one that's never home and starts yelling
if she poops somewhere. And I love to do crazy things to her that I don't
think she really likes. (like putting her head in my mouth....)
All in all, I'm so thankful that we got her. I ended up selling some of my
prized possessions for her, but she's worth it!!!!
Thank you God!!
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| In the short short time I was in Seattle, I think God did a LOT in my heart.
One of the most significant thing was the two sermons I heard while I was there.
The first sermon was at New Hope, where my dear friend Ali goes. We were late
(mostly because of me), but I was so thankful. The sermon was on Matt 25:14-30,
the parable of the talents. It was about investments, how God made us all different,
how God gives us different things according to our capacity, but all is called to
invest, to obey and to increase. This is a classic parable. At first, I just thought it was
a good sermon, esp. for the beginning of the year, and didn't think much of it. But I
was at a bible study today, and it dawned on me what the whole "increase" and "bury"
meant. Part of what I came up with may only pertain to Korean churches, but I believe
God placed it in my heart. Comments such as, "I don't know the Word too much, so
I can't..", "I don't have a lot of experience, so I can't..." "I don't have time so I can't..."
"I don't know anything so I can't..." and the list goes on. It may seem HUMBLING
at first. Oh how we fall into false humility... The Word says,
for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God -Romans 3:23
Not at all! Let God be true, and every man a liar. As it is written: "So that you may be proved right when you speak and prevail when you judge." -Romans 3:4
It is a given that we're all once (hopefully, if you truly believe that you are saved) sinners, and it
is a given that we have all fallen short of God's glory. And I'm pretty sure God is
very aware of this. So us not knowing the Word enough, not having enough experience,
not feeling worthy are us "burying our talent." With the little we are given, we are called
to use it, learn, obey and increase it. Of course, there is nothing for us to worry about in
that process, because the farmer can sow and water the plant, but it is God who makes
he plant grow and bear fruit. I also was just listening to an online GC sermon about sowing
seeds with what we say, do... so if we keep on saying I can't do this and can't do that,
that will become who we are, which is us burying our talents in the ground. We will lose
our given talents and be called a "wicked servant."
The second sermon was at Jubilee, given by Pastor Joey Wandler. It was a difficult sermon,
and I had to chew on it (and still am), but it gave me great peace. It was on 4 examples.
Genesis 2 (about tree of life)
1 Samuel 24
1 Samuel 26
Luke 22
The summary of the sermon was "God sometimes provides/creates opportunities that were
never meant for us to take." Joey did say that ppl are going to hate him after the message,
which just says that it is that difficult to take in. God created the tree of life, but Adam and
Eve were never meant to eat out of it. David had the ultimate opportunity to kill the man
who was trying to kill him. One of the chances were even prophesied over. But David,
being the man of God, did not take either chances. The last one is about how Jesus
makes the disciples buy swords, but when Peter uses it later, Jesus warns him of his action.
Sometimes God gives us these chances to test our heart, so that we don't seek after the
"award" or "self promotion," but rather, His heart. This gave me peace, because there were
times where I felt like I missed my opportunity by doing what I thought was God's way.
I realize that altho I may feel like I'm losing, I know that I am gaining, for to live is Christ
and to die is gain.
I still have to chew on this, but I know that God is by my side all the way. I don't know
if ppl here understand anything about me and my love for Jesus and my passion for
His Kingdom, but I sure hope that I shine His light in some way. I also trust in His love
that I am never losing, but always victorious.
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| It's already 2008
I'm already missing Seattle and all the wonderful people
I'm already overwhelmed by school (although I haven't set a foot yet since I got back)
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The short visit to Seattle was soooo good. It was too short, and I so wish that I had more time
to spend with so many people and share what's going on in each other's lives, but I guess I have
to be satisfied with what I had. I didn't have much time to think or soak things in, but I knew that
my soul was at rest, and that God was formatting everything, or rather, getting rid of a lot of junk
in my heart. It was good that I didn't have to worry about all the drama that's going on here, and
I just... didn't... THINK! This is so important for me because I tend to over-analyze and over-think.
(I was even "prophesied" that I think too much. I totally agree) I think this visit sort of healed that
unending homesickness and that feeling of "things were so much better before" mentality, which
is not so recommended in the Bible. But strangely, the moment the wheels of the plane touched
the ground, I felt this peace in my heart that said, "you are home. This is where you belong. This
is where I'm waiting for you." Not that I couldn't feel God's presence in Seattle or anything, but
I think it was God's way of confirming that I am called to be here in Austin.
After a whole year's struggle of trying to find "what makes me happy," I realized that even if
I am in a situation that is not so appealing, wherever God wants me to be, that's where I'll find
most joy. I'm reminded of the confession Brother Yun made in his biography, "The Heavenly
Man." After all the persecution, torture etc., his confession is still, "His will be done." As much
as I would LOVE to just stay in Seattle (heeheehee), I know I'm called to be here.
Oh, and there's a cute doggy that we were pet-sitting for 2 weeks. The owner doesn't take care
of the dog at all, and my friend (who's rooming with this bad bad owner) wants to get rid of the dog.
I know it'll be a lot of responsibility, but I would LOVE to keep the dog. I'm praying about it...
I miss ya'll already! Even if I didn't get to see you, being in Seattle brings back so much memories,
and I really missed everyone.
Love and God bless!!!!
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